Relationships come into our life as a first baby of a couple, with lots of joy, hope, and dreams. But, it goes like a broken dream of dawn with a pinch of sadness and a faint light of hope with a small question mark. But, how long it stays it should play a beautiful melody in our lives. That means; when a relationship gives us comfort and shelter in life and makes us cool or cheerful even in the time of huge stress is a melodious relationship. A relationship will be melodious only when a harmony is maintained among the people, involved in it.
The Relationship comes and goes on its own way. One cannot hold it alone by his/ her own efforts. But what we can hold is love for the person to whom we were attached. Not even, a hate as well. That’s a different matter. We’ll talk later about that.
So, what we can do to make it beautiful, peaceful and melodious, is maintaining the harmony in our relationships. There are eight things, which secretly maintained this harmony. If we know those well, we can consciously control those to make a relationship.
8 things secretly maintained the harmony of Relationship:
A relationship ends when the people, involved in the relationship start to count their giving and taking. We forget that we came into this world with empty hands. We can give only to the extent that we have gained from here. Otherwise, we have nothing to give to anyone. Just see the nature. Harmony is maintained everywhere in nature. Like, a relationship between flora and soil. The plant receives nutrient and water from soil and soil produces those by collecting the raw materials from the decomposed leaves, flower and fruits. In summer, when there is a scarcity of water, a plant can’t grow well and become unable to supply the raw materials to the soil for making manure. On the other hand, Soil is also dependent on the plant as it saves soil from soil erosion. In this way, a mutual dependency is maintained within each other. One thing I also want to clear that taking and receiving are completely different things. Taking is more related to the opportunity, whereas, receiving relates to acceptance. So, just concentrate on your giving. Your giving is your receiving.
If you truly care for someone, you can understand his/her some unsaid words like some small wishes, some little dream, likes, and dislikes. When you start to value them, you will be valuable from him/ her. It’s human nature that we always prefer to stay with someone who thinks that we are valuable and important. In short, everyone wants importance. So, as long as, this ‘valuable’feeling stays between each other, the relationship grows in harmonic motion.
Trust is the basic thing of every relationship. Maintaining this is hard, but without this, no relationship can exist. You can maintain it by talking about your worries and doubts, clearly with your partner in a very healthy way. Try to be faithful to each other. Both should be careful about their small lies because sometimes a small lie can bring a big heartache.
- Urge of solving problems:
Anger, loose talk, misunderstandings, not understandings, clashing of views, conflicts, blaming each other etc. are common problems in every relationship. But, these are also a part of maintaining harmony. A melody would be great when it is composed of up and down notes, but it feels boring when it plays in a monotonic motion. The melody of relationship will stay harmonious as long as there will be an urge of solving these problems and being close to each other again.
Ignorance is the worst punishment of any relationship. It also acts as a signal of breaking the harmony. You can ignore some of the activities of your partner that you don’t like that can be called as ‘overlook’. But, ignoring a person completely, is the sign of ‘breaking’. It says, “your role is over, you may go now”. So, maintaining a respect for each other is very essential. No one can be perfect. But, everybody has some good and bad qualities. Try to find out the good ones of your partner by an impartial vision and respect those qualities.
There is no place of ego in a relationship. There is nothing wrong in bowing down to a person, whom you love. Ego acts as a killer of relationship. Einstein said, “More the knowledge lesser the ego, lesser the knowledge more the ego.” It not only breaks the harmony, it ruins the complete relationship as well. So, keep your ego away from your relationship and maintain the harmony.
- Support and Empathy:
These two are very much linked with each other. Basically, we are all alone. We always find some support from our relationship. Support means not a blind encouragement. Support means when someone falls, holding him/her tightly. Support means inspiring. Support means giving shelter in a rainy season. Harmony is running after the support. Support comes from empathy for each other.
- Unconditional love:
Either love creates a relationship or a relationship creates love. A relationship will be melodious when it is bound with love. The word ‘unconditional’ means there is no counting for giving, taking, caring, helping and loving. This ‘unconditional love‘ makes the relationship easier. That’s mean, you cannot think before doing anything for your partner or the other person in the relationship. Even, it makes you feel happy for giving and receiving too.
A relationship is expired when it loses its harmony. If we try to continue the relationship after the expiry date, it will not run. The relationship which takes us in life at a time becomes a vast consignment of our lifetime. Just look at nature around you. Disasters, hurdles, misdeeds come into nature, again and again, in spite of that, it follows a rhythm to maintain its harmony everywhere. These 8 things are like a rhythm that maintain the natural harmony in every relationship. So, try to follow this rhythm and built a harmonious relationship.